From a book I'm not really supposed to be reading

Why? It's written for Christian men...NICE Christian men. It's called, No More Christian Nice Guy.

"The church told me to worry more about sin than purpose, more about keeping up appearances than searching for and embracing meaning. More about what I shouldn't do than what I should do. More about being nice than being good. Fear of failure, of falling short, of trying, but not being perfect, has us paralyzed, immobile, and, eventually, indifferent.

"...Think about how pleasing the illusion of a conflict-free life is to the ears of Nice Guys. Who can confront them with criticism if they don't do anything noticeable?..."

And, from R.C. Sproul (a guy I need to see more of):

"When I became a Christian, I understood that Jesus took my sin away. What I never heard from Him was that He intended to take my backbone away."

I could quote more, but I'm in danger of violating copyright as it is!