Stair Wars??

A good friend and former partner of Brian's called last Saturday to tell Brett that he'd recommended him for a job on their construction site. The position is entry-level and it pays over $3 an hour more than the job he's currently working. Brett went for an interview yesterday and got it.

Later, I told him that Jay is probably thinking that he (Brett) is going to be wonderful on the job based on the quality of work Brian always did, as he had the reputation for being one of the best in the business. Brett looked a little confused a second, then kind of smirked and said, "Do you mean Jay thinks I'm 'The Chosen One'?"

Here's to the week

Rotten weekend. Won't explain. Just rotten...depressing...convoluted.

I understand

Something has kicked in me in the past few weeks. I guess the reason has been the time...time with my daughter...time FOR my family...time to be the wife and mother I love to be...

I'm already wanting to cry because this will be over so soon.

But that's not why I'm here now--"now" while I'm in the midst of making picked-from-our-tree fresh peach pies. I'm here because the past few weeks have given me some time to think a little more about life and faith and I've realized what Jesus said so long ago is, of course, true. We're blessed when we come to Him as little children--when our faith consists of just trusting and believing. I'm not as blessed when I'm philosophizing about the different beliefs and denominations and I'm certainly not as blessed when I'm considering the political ramifications of our faith, or, for that matter, the religious ramifications of our politics. I'm most blessed when I just accept and believe and trust and hope and love.

In honor of Ben's dad

I'm giddy over the prospect of Number 1 and 2 sons sharing an apartment. Once they have to live with each other, they won't have us to blame for their screw-ups and their messes. I expect the experiment to escalate to blows before the first three months end.

I'll probably end up with the same smirk.

I'm to THAT point

I'm convinced that the "all" in "all of our representatives are currently helping other customers" consists of one person.

And WHY do they interrupt their canned music and announcements to tell you that one will be with you shortly? You know they don't mean it and even if they did, it's so disappointing to hear the music go dead, only to have such an announcement be the reason for the interruption.

Also, you know you're not the only one who needs help when the rep comes back to the phone no less than five times to tell you she's putting you back on hold because they're still trying to figure out what is wrong.

Getting used to this

I forgot how much I enjoy being a wife and mother. My house is decent (NOT great, but decent), my energy level is good, and my heart is content.

THEN I think about "only" seven more weeks. Normally I start dreading the return of school the day after it lets out and it intensifies through the summer. This year I dreaded the start of this year before last year ended. Sad.

It's always the way

"Christian" Murphy's Law:

1. If you pray for patience, you'll get some of the most trying times of your life;
2. If you pray that your child will be put in a circumstance that teaches him humility, you'll be sure to get a lesson of your own first.

If anyone has a direct line to Bill Gates

Please tell him that his HATEMAIL, as several of us call it, has more pop-ups and spam connected to it than Cinergy has homes connected to its energy supply.

Just thinking

A few years ago...OK, MANY years ago...I occupied a seat in a history classroom. I hate to say I was learning. The truth of the matter is that I don't remember much of anything about what was taught there except for UK basketball. ("Who is Joe B. Hall?" I was stupid enough to ask that question at the height of his career. I'm not much more informed today.) That's all I really remember--actually, that and one more thing: Dale Dicken's visits.

I remember Mr. Dicken popping into class every whip-stitch, as we say, giving us demonstrations of philosophical thought. I was not into philosophy at that time. I had been taught not to question the obvious...not to question authority...not to question, period. (Side note: this value has really hampered my dream of writing. End side note.) His visits then meant little more to me than a way to get out of the history/basketball discussion for the day. I could pretty much nod automatically in just the right spots and be finished with class until the next go-round.

Oddly enough, though, one visit he made still sticks with me today and, even more oddly, I awoke considering this this morning. I believe the whole visit angered me...maybe "angered" is a strong word. Let's say I was "unsettled" once it was over. Today, I'm still unsettled, but for a different reason.

During that visit, Mr. Dicken said that most people didn't become Christians for any other reason than to gain Heaven or avoid Hell--and probably more the latter. If those two places didn't exist in their beliefs, they would not be Christians at all. As I've said, I had learned not to question and I knew, in particular, not to question the Church. My Protestant beliefs were strong. My church was the right one. And maybe I was thinking, "What other reason can there be to be a Christian?" I left class that day, miffed as only a 17-year-old girl can be.

So I watched folks through the years come to church, get baptized, and never show up again. "Fire insurance," Big Bob calls it today; but as I watched, I rejoiced as I was supposed to ("Now I belong to Jesus; Jesus belongs to me..." in a tempo too slow for even a funeral dirge) and I went on my way, thinking about how someone else was most likely saved from the fires of Hell.

And one day, I realized Mr. Dicken was right about one Christian, at least.

I awoke this morning, as I sometimes do, wondering if, in the end, I'd get to Heaven or go to Hell. You must forgive me. Old habits die hard. I don't want my life to be based solely on a battle between two eternal destinations any more than I want my relationship with my husband to be based solely on the physical realm; but the selfish self still reigns in my life and I want to be saved from the fires of Hell usually more than I want to stick my neck out to have a real relationship with a Man who died to save me from them.